A love letter to a younger me
I use this platform to empower women in all areas of life, whether that’s business, wealth, self-worth, health or wellness. Today, I want to talk about women and our menstrual cycles 🙈 This isn’t just one for the ladies! Guys, it’s super important for you to understand how a woman’s body works too 🙏
I wish I had someone explain to me when I was younger the superpower that women hold in their cycle. I’ve learned so much about my cycle in the last 12 months as a 28-year-old, and I’m kind of annoyed that I was never told these things when I first got my period at 15 🤷♀️ There’s a good ten years of my life where I would have done things differently if I did know these things.
I’m not sure about you, but when I first got my period, the first thing I thought was that I needed to quickly go on the pill as I could now fall pregnant 😳That was seriously the only thing I was told about my period! Essentially, I just believed it meant I could now have babies 😅
So this is a little love letter to my younger self – or to the other ladies out there that never had a proper conversation about their period when they were younger ❤️ I now realise that your cycle is a road map and a superpower to help you lean into your femininity. When you really understand your cycle, you know how to live and work in a way that aligns with your energy, honours your truth and moulds around your lifestyle 🙌
Lady lying poolside
The Taboo Topic
I am no expert, and I’m only sharing this from personal experience, but this isn’t a conversation about sex 🙅♀️ Your period is so much more than that! When I was younger, it was such a taboo topic. It was yucky, personal, inconvenient and too intimate to discuss with even your closest friends.
I think that’s why many girls in my generation were put on the pill straight away, yet no one ever told us about the symptoms, side effects and dangers that come with that 😓 It’s not until I’m embarking on my 30s that I’m really starting to learn about this and realise how your cycle is a gift after years of trying to get rid of it.
It’s a Sign You’re Healthy
Your period is not just a sign that you can have babies; it’s a marker that you’re healthy. So many of my friends have been getting their “period” on the pill for the last 10 years, and assuming this means they’re healthy.
But, if you’re on the pill, these aren’t actually periods because you’re not ovulating!
It actually means you’re masking many symptoms that truly indicate health because you’re getting a fake bleed. That’s a whole different conversation about fertility, but it’s super important to know that your period is essentially a sign of your health as a woman.
What was really never discussed with me was the superpowers that come with our period. I think our generation of women are more in our masculinity than any generation before us, because we’re expected to be a great wife, mum, friend and daughter – while also having an income and climbing up the ladder in our careers 😅 We are trying to work and live like men despite being wired energetically and psychologically - differently.
Your Cycle
That’s where our cycle can come in - and can be your superpower in honouring your femininity. You can actually only fall pregnant within 48 hours of our cycle. From such a young age it’s instilled into us that we need to use the pill as contraception to avoid falling pregnant.
But there are other contraception options beyond the pill that can keep you protected without messing with your health as a woman. It might be something worth discussing with your health practitioner and actually learning about some of the symptoms that you’re going through.
Pain isn’t normal, irregular periods are not normal, depression and big mood swings are not normal, and getting a bleed on the pill doesn’t mean you’re actually getting your period 💥
Credit: Lauren Kerr beach side
Men and women are simply wired differently.
I see so many women in the workplace going through burnout. We’re trying to do everything and be all things for all people, all the time. Energetically, it’s just not sustainable, and we end up feeling frustrated that we can’t juggle it all 😖
What I’m about to teach you will help you practice kindness, patience and compassion towards yourself: it will show you your superpower and how you can get everything done without burning out 🥰
Fun Fact: Women actually have a monthly hormone cycle, but men have a 24-hour hormone cycle.
Energetically, we’re wired differently and psychologically, we work differently too. Both sides of the female brain talk to each other, which makes us really good with intuition, emotions, reading people, reading social cues and showing empathy. On the other hand, men are more dominant on one side than the other.
They use one side of the brain at a time, which means they have less fluctuation in their emotion, think more logically than emotionally and aren’t as good as multitasking as us. They’ll probably feel the same today as they did yesterday at that time during the day, where women may have a week of feeling emotional, followed by a week of feeling really social.
When no one is teaching women about this, they’re often left feeling like something is wrong with them 💔 They’ll question their mental health, self worth and productivity - being confused as to why they went from feeling on top of the world and bossing life, to really emotional, insecure and needing down time – without realising it’s a natural cycle that will happen every month 😌. When we understand this and predict when changes are coming, we can strategically plan our life, whether that’s professional or personal 🙏
WINTER
What I want to teach you is a really simple way to embrace this. I like to think about this in terms of the four seasons – summer, autumn, winter and spring. Every woman has their own four seasons. Let’s think about winter as when you’re on your period. I want you to think about what this time of the month looks like for you.
For most of us it’s a time of introspection and our intuition is peaked. For me, this is a time in my cycle when I need to have more self-love. This might mean cacao, baths, more cuddles, and really prioritising time with my partner in winter ✨
The shadow: However (like every season) be aware of the duality. In this season (week or so). I used to feel like I was letting people down because I wasn’t living or performing up to my usual standard and I couldn’t give my best. My energy felt forced and fake. I try to plan for this by not making appointments socially or professionally at this time, and instead focus on things I can do on my own - whether it’s finalising tasks, writing blogs, booking keep or prepping for a new month or promotion. I give myself permission to say no, and enjoy white space and just rest. This is a time for looking after you and practising self compassion and remembering rest is productive too.
SPRING
The week after winter comes spring. This is when you’re in the lead up to ovulation. This is the best time to start setting goals or intentions for the next month. Plan out campaigns and start creating content. This is where I may schedule live videos, interviews, marketing efforts, and networking events as a business owner.
In spring, I start feeling creative and inspired to take on new projects with new energy and ideas. I love to use this time to journal, meditate, dance and be all-around a bit more playful. So for your spring, start thinking about what you can do to embrace this? 🤔
The shadow: This is also a time when I can fall into overwhelm. I have this tendency of being so inspired and motivated that I take on way more than I can handle. If I know this as my cycle, I can set good boundaries and look after myself too 💫 This is where a good goal setting template or calendar comes in handy to plan out your next month or 4 weeks of projects to be able to honour and protect your energy and commitments.
Credit: Lauren Kerr standing by the water
SUMMER
Next comes summer, and this is usually the time when you’re ovulating. Science has shown that when you’re ovulating and you’re obviously at your most fertile, you unconsciously begin luring sexual partners in 😏. You will often notice you feel more social, flirty and even an increase in your sex drive!
Scientists have even found they can depict when women are ovulating because they unconsciously start to wear less clothing 😜 In this season I find I like to wear more makeup, get a blow-dry and get dressed up to have a night out with my girlfriends 💃. This is the perfect time in your cycle to plan catch ups with friends as energetically you can pour from your overflow.
You are also most magnetic at this point of your cycle - so strategically if you can, this is the perfect time to go to networking events, pitch ideas, sell online, ask for a pay rise, look for a romantic partner or go for a new job or promotion.
The shadow: A shadow of this season is that it’s easy for women to become more selfish during this season. Even if you’re in a loving and happy relationship, you might catch yourself out with wandering eyes 👀 You might get a little excited or flirty, and can fall into the trap of not being very thoughtful of others because you’re so consumed with how you’re feeling. Our vibe is high and often we don’t want anyone to f*&k with it! We also crave fun in this season and may be more social than usual - which means we may (briefly) loose focus of our goals and may not have the motivation to work. So instead consciously batch the ‘work’ that requires you to be social and extroverted so you can take advantage of this week in your cycle when your energy is at its peak.
AUTUMN
But like everything, it’s only a season, and these emotions are followed by autumn. Just like the season Autumn, this is a great time in your cycle to cleanse and get rid of dead energy - whether it be cleaning out your work space, emails, finishing off projects before a new cycle or reflecting on habits or relationships that may no longer be serving you.
The shadow: This season is often when we are more reflective and feel a little bit tired or sensitive than usual. It’s really important to know that this doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you! It’s completely normal to go into a period of turning inwards after a period of summer. You can only do it all and be it all when you give yourself time to slow down and honour yourself. I like to look after myself during this time with massages, cleaning my house/space and journaling. I often find myself feeling more anxious during this time, but I find it really helpful to embrace these feelings and be kind to myself… knowing just like every season, this too shall pass. We can’t be go go go all the time - it isn’t sustainable or realistic.
Understanding Your Cycle
As a woman, if you understand these cycles and you’re not thinking that your period is a yucky inconvenience, it can be the most beautiful blessing in your life. So many of us are looking for validation externally of how we are feeling and seeking permission to slow down and give ourselves a break, but we need to learn how to use our own emotions and feelings as internal guidance to work in alignment with our hormone levels. It’s a simple way to strategically plan our lives and businesses to be the best version of ourselves.
It’s been the most beautiful journey for me to dive into this over the past 12 months with the beautiful resources on cycle syncing, women health education and moon tracking inside the Healthstyle Emporium.
I only wished someone taught me this when I was 15 rather than marketing trying to sell me tampons, sex ed classes telling me to be fearful of pregnancy, doctors encouraging me to get on the pill and society pressuring me to go on living life as if nothing had changed and to keep up with my male peers in school and the workplace.
So to a younger version of me (and you if you never had someone teach you this)… congratulations you got your period!!! This is a gift and a superpower you can tap into for the rest of your life if you choose to harness it correctly. Men don’t have this - so I encourage you lean into your femininity and leverage off it. It is such a beautiful self care ritual as well as a bio hack for productivity!
