TIS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY š¤¶ How to find joy more oftenš
š¤¶Christmas is around the corner āļø
And weāre on the home run to the end of 2020 now. Crazy, right? Itās been a year of slowing down, surrendering and Iāve had so many breakthroughs. Iāve had the time to dismantle a lot of my self-limiting beliefs which I believe was necessary to take me to that next level and depth in life, business and relationships.
While there has been plenty of joy in my year, I also acknowledge the challenges weāve faced too...
When Iāve stopped to ask people how they are over the past few weeks/months, the most common responses that come up are:
Overwhelmed. š
Worried. š³
Uncertain. š„
Anxious. š„ŗ
And Iād be lying if I said I hadnāt felt these emotions too! š
These feelings are normalā¦ š¤
Firstly, itās essential to acknowledge that these feelings are totally normal after the year weāve all had. Life as we knew it was completely turned on its head š¤Æ and weāve seen changes in just about every aspect of our lifestyles.
A good indicator of your mental health is that you feel appropriate feelings. So donāt be angry at yourself for being overwhelmed, being stressed or feeling worried right now, because the fact that youāre even feeling those emotions means that you actually do have good mental health because those are all natural responses to the usual circumstances youāve lived through this year.
Expanding my knowledgeā¦
With my background in psychology, itās no secret how passionate I am about mental health and holistic health š I recently spent a few days with leading researchers and experts in the area at āThe Happiness and its Causesā Conference.
This event happens every year and is an excellent opportunity for health professionals to share the most recent positive psychology research so we can learn how to apply these findings in our lives, relationships, careers and businesses.
It was so incredible to be a part of these discussions and build my own knowledge, but whatās knowledge if itās not shared? If people arenāt sharing the resources and information they have, how can we possibly become collectively happier and healthier?
So thatās what Iām here to do nowā¦ šāāā
One of the leading causes of death for people my age (which is the same age as many of my followers!) is suicide. Itās obviously not a light and easy conversation to have, but itās also a necessity with 1 in 4 sometime in our life experiencing depression.
Itās something thatās affecting all of usā¦š¤Æ
And thatās why itās essential that we talk about it š¬, share constructive strategies to go through it and even replace these feelings with more joy.
One of my favourite speakers at the event spoke about how we can find joy on demand. ā¤ļø
And what better opportunity to talk about finding joy š¬ than the start of the jolly seasonš! So here are a few of my golden nuggets:
š¤¶ Joy is a feeling that you feel moment to momentā¦
A lot of people speak about happiness, but theyāre actually referring to the elated feeling of joy.
Happiness is more of your attitude or overall perspective on lifeā¦
Joy is something that you have to find and grasp onto in every moment. The most recent research is showing that you can ease yourself into these feelings, and itās actually your brainās default setting, so you have a sustainable source that is infinite and can be unlocked at anytime!
Meditationā¦
Many people understanding the importance of having a nourishing diet and moving their body, yet few fewer realise how important it is to look after our minds too š And meditation is one of the best ways we can do this.
Meditation can decrease cortisol levels, helps build resilience, encourages compassion and manages stress... š§āāā
This is why we have a whole āmindsetā section with meditations, life coaching activities, gratitude, moon tracking, manifestation and journal prompts for our members in our holistic health program The Healthstyle Emporium so they can be empowered to nourish their mind, body and soul from the inside out.
If you are a regular meditator (which I know many of us are ā¤ļø), youāll notice that when you drown out the noise, you get clear, calm and still. This sense of peace is when joy comes naturally, so itās a great way to ease yourself into it.
Even just 5 to 10 minutes a day can helpā¦ āļø
Knowing that joy is your default state means you can find joy on any day and at any time too.
š¤¶ Take the opportunity to notice joyā¦
Joy is something that you experience in thin slices of time and space, but weāre spending so much time outside of ourselves that weāre missing the joy, weāre missing the moment.
When we donāt take the opportunity to acknowledge the joy, we donāt have the chance to enjoy the joy ā especially given how short the moments of joy can be š¢
When you start noticing the moments, you can train your brain to start picking up on them more often. You have this part of your brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS for short š) which is basically a built in confirmation bias OR super power āØ (depends how you look at it and consciously use it š).
If you start telling your brain what you want, it starts looking to confirm that bias. Your brain is so good at what it does that it takes short cuts to only look for the things you want it to š
The morning is a great time to do this...š
If you start your day by reflecting on your goals, highest values, writing in your gratitude journal or reading your personal mission statement, youāre activating your RAS system for the day ahead and setting yourself up to keep noticing those things.
Joy is no different! Start small and appreciate the little things, and your brain will continue to find those feelings. Use the festive season as the perfect excuse to start! š It might be watching your children laugh, cherishing the embrace of a parent or savouring the first mouthful of your pavlova š¤
š¤¶ Be on the end of a kind thought.
Another interesting topic discussed at the conference was the idea of being āon the end of a kind thoughtā. This could mean sitting at the end of your meditation and asking yourself āWho do I want to send love to today?ā, āWho do you hope is having a beautiful day?ā, āWho do you need to send light or strength to today?ā.
These questions are proven to uplift your spirits and can completely change your outlook on a day.
The idea came from a recent study where they were studying employees levels of satisfaction at work. Some loved their job; others couldnāt stand being there š Regardless of how they felt about their role, they found they felt uplifted after setting a timer every hour and using the alarm as a reminder to stop and think a kind thought and send love to someone on his heart.
A man who was previously miserable in his job role, after this experiment reported to have had the best week of his life during the study ā even though nothing actually changed in the workplace or his surroundings, he was just consistently on the end of a kind thought! š
š¤¶ FINDING JOY IN THE JOYFUL SEASON
š¤¶Time to relax and enjoy the festive season š
I honestly canāt believe weāre already in December?! Itās crazy, right? I know itās been an overwhelming and challenging year for everyone between world pandemics, economy crashes, global warming disasters, politics and social movementsā¦ but I also think itās been a necessary year for many of us.
And as we come towards the end of the year, there is no better time to be looking for joy in our lives, reflecting on our lessons and relishing in our blessings.
Iām hoping that you have a merry season with your loved ones and enjoy all the yummy food, drinks (I am looking forward to mumās mango daiquiris on Christmas Day š) and belly laughs!
Sending so much love from my family to yours and am so excited to see what 2021 has in store for us all.